Something a friend asked me recently prompted me to write this.
We cannot always change what happened.
Someone hurt us.
A relationship broke.
A body was wounded.
A community suffered.
And sometimes, remembering what happened can keep the violence alive: through blame, revenge, punishment, separation, or the longing for someone to pay.
But perhaps there is another possibility.
What if remembering is not only about holding on to what happened, but asking:
What can happen now?
The past may have been violent.
But perhaps our relationship with the past need not be.
We can remember without seeking revenge.
Mourn without making someone wrong.
Acknowledge suffering without passing it on.
Perhaps this is another dimension of nonviolence:
Not pretending violence never happened,
but transforming what we do with its memory.
Violence breaks us apart.
Can memory bring us together?
Violence takes life.
Can what remains become nourishment?
We cannot always change what happened.
But perhaps we can change what happens next.
That, to me, feels like a little piece of Wobbly Wisdom.